Two Cents Worth
Monday, October 31, 2005
I stole this but thought it'd be a good way to start.


Copy this entire list into your blog. BOLD everything about you that is true.
Leave plain anything that is false about you.
Put an asterisk (*) at the end of false statements you would LIKE to be true.


I have had sex while wearing a blindfold.
I have blindfolded someone else during sex.
I have had sex while watching porn.
I have had sex while surfing porn on the Internet.

I sleep better after sex.
There are some nights I cannot sleep without sex or masturbating.
The bed is NOT my most favorite place to have sex.
I am turned on knowing someone is watching me masturbate.
I have masturbated for someone over a web cam.
I have had sex over a web cam.

I will have sex with someone I just met if they turn me on.
I have been tied up during sex.
I have had sex with someone who was tied up.
I have dripped wax onto a lover's body.
I have had a lover drip wax onto my body.
I have a foot fetish.
I have a leather fetish.
I have a tickle fetish.
I like being choked during sex.
I have had sex in a burning building.
I have erotic art on display somewhere in my residence.*
I enjoy nudie magazines.
Erotic toys are a regular part of my budget.
I think PLAYBOY is tame, maybe even boring.
I have clicked on porn links in my email.
I know the difference between girl/girl and lesbian sex in porn.
I have watched more than one gay/lesbian porn video.
Much of what I know about sex comes from porn.
Interracial sex turns me on. * No more or less*
I think we should do more to understand the cultures of sex.
I would participate in sex research given the opportunity.
My current lover does not sufficiently meet my sexual needs.
I currently have a "crush" on someone of the same sex.
I have had sex at my place of employment.
I am often disappointed in my sexual relationships.
Some people might describe me as a nymphomaniac.
I am difficult to live with if I'm not having sex on a regular basis.
I sleep better with someone snuggled up next to me.
I have had sex under water.
I have had sex in the snow.
I am in a polyamorous relationship.*
I have to have music playing while having sex.
I have had more than ten orgasms in one night.
I have flashed strangers.
I have given sex as a gift.
I have set-up a three-way for my lover.
I stopped during this list to have sex.
posted by twocents @ 4:20 PM   7 comments
Well Here I Be
Whew, I hate moving! I think I've gotten everything set up here.
I'll be a little more careful this time.

Now I've got to get caught up on my reading.
posted by twocents @ 11:27 AM   2 comments
Saturday, October 01, 2005
From October 2005
Back to the Tunage

Jason has two songs actually.
Lynyrd Skynyrd - Simple Man
Mama told me when I was young
Come sit beside me, my only son
And listen closely to what I say.
And if you do this
It'll help you some sunny day.
Oh, take your time...
Don't live too fast,
Troubles will come and they will pass.
Go find a woman, oh baby, you'll find love,
And don't forget son,
There is someone up above.
And be a simple kind of man.
Be something you love and understand.
Baby be a simple, kind of man.
Oh, won't you do this for me son,
If you can?
Forget your lust for the rich man's gold
All that you need, oh lord, is in your soul,
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try.
All that I want for you my son,
Is to be satisfied.
And be a simple kind of man.
Be something you love and understand.
Baby be a simple, kind of man.
Oh, won't you do this for me son, If you can?
Boy, don't you worry... you'll find yourself.
Follow your heart, lord, and nothing else.
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try.
All that I want for you my son,
Is to be satisfied.

And in honor of his cute lil Easter egg....The Hamster Dance
Da DA Dee Dah Dee Da DOO DOO Dee da DEE DEE DOH

Lynn and Monkey and T
Joss Stone - I've Fallen in Love With You
I've fallen in love with you
Please, tell me, tell me what else was there to do
When feelin lips like yours and looking into eyes like yours
Oh, I might as well face it
Cause it's true
Yes, I've fallen in love with you
Oh, my beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away
I've fallen in love with you (ooh baby, please stay)
I've fallen in love with you
I've fallen in love with you
And you've just got to feel the same way too
When you embraced me last night
Lord knows it was pure, such pure delight
Oh, my beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away
Oh yes, my love Oh yes, my love
My darlin I've fallen in love with you
I've fallen in love
I've fallen so deep in love you see
Until you become the very soul of me
Let me tell you something,
I don't care WHO KNOWS
All over, hey, all over my face it shows
Said I'm talkin bout love this time
Oh, yes I am
And you know what?
It's not a schoolgirl crush
Oh no, no Ooh, baby, yea
Oh my beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away
My beating heart wants you
And my empty arms need you
Don't you go, please stay
And never try to send me away
I've fallen in love with you (yes, my love)
I've fallen in love with you (in love with you, in love with you)
I've fallen in love with you (it's not infatuation cause I would really know)
I've fallen in love with you(My beating heart wants you, you know it wants you)
I've fallen in love with you(I've fallen for you)
I've fallen in love(I'm falling in love)
I've fallen in love with you(Tell me, what else was there to do?)
I've fallen in love

Popeye
Blind Melon - No Rain
All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
I like watchin' the puddles gather rain
And all I can do is just pour some tea for two
and speak my point of view
But it's not sane, It's not sane
I just want someone to say to me oh,oh, oh, oh
I'll always be there when you wake
Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today
So stay with me and I'll have it made
And I don't understand why I sleep all day
And I start to complain that there's no rain
And all I can do is read a book to stay awake
And it rips my life away,
but it's a great escape escape......escape......escape......
All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
ya don't like my point of view ya think I'm insane
Its not sane......it's not sane.
I just want someone to say to me oh, oh, oh
I'll always be there when you wake
Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today
So stay with me and I'll have it made
I'll have it made
I'll have it made
You know we're really gonna,
really gonna have it made
Gonna have it made
________________________________________________________

How is it that the touch of one person can make everything else feel right. How is it that a few hours or so of undivided and total attention can return me to that right place in my head. Today I can cope, excel even. How is it that one person can be that important to me, when I spend so much time trying to deny it. Today, big deals aren't so big. Problems are manageable. I am loved.
So simple and so important, I am loved.
My heart is full.
__________________________________________________________

It’s Weird Part III

Maddy
Dar Williams - The Beauty of the Rain
And you know the light is fading all too soon
You're just two umbrellas one late afternoon
You don't know the next thing you will say
This is your favorite kind of day
It has no walls, the beauty of the rain is how it falls,
how it falls, how it falls
And there's nothing wrong,
but there is something more
And sometimes you wonder what you love her for
She says you've known her deepest fears
Cause she's shown you a box of stained-glass tears
It can't be all, the truth about the rain is how it falls,
how it falls, how it falls
But when she gave you more to find
You let her think she'd lost her mind and that's all on you
Feeling helpless if she asked for help or scared
you'd have to change yourself
And you can't deny this room will keep you warm
You can look out of your window at the storm
But you watch the phone and hope it rings
You'll take her any way she sings, or how she calls,
the beauty of the rain is how it falls,
how it falls, how it falls
How it falls, how it falls, how it falls

Icylyrics
Loreena McKennitt - Marrakesh Night Market
They're gathered in circles the lamps light their faces
The crescent moon rocks in the sky
The poets of drumming keep heartbeats suspended
The smoke swirls up and then it dies
Would you like my mask?
would you like my mirror?
cries the man in the shadowing hood
You can look at yourself
you can look at each other
or you can look at the face of your god
The stories are woven and fortunes are told
The truth is measured by the weight of your gold
The magic lies scattered on rugs on the ground
Faith is conjured in the night market's sound
Would you like my mask?
would you like my mirror?
cries the man in the shadowing hood
You can look at yourself
you can look at each other
or you can look at the face of your god
The lessons are written on parchments of paper
They're carried by horse from the river Nile
says the shadowy voice
In the firelight, the cobra is casting the flame a winsome smile
Would you like my mask?
would you like my mirror?
cries the man in the shadowing hood
You can look at yourself
you can look at each other
or you can look at the face of your god

Tiger
Alanis Morissette - Mary Jane
What's the matter Mary Jane, you had a hard day
As you place the don't disturb sign on the door
You lost your place in line again, what a pity
You never seem to want to dance anymore
It's a long way down
On this roller coaster
The last chance streetcar
Went off the track
And you're on it
I hear you're counting sheep again Mary Jane
What's the point of trying to dream anymore
I hear you're losing weight again Mary Jane
Do you ever wonder who you're losing it for
Well it's full speed baby
In the wrong direction
There's a few more bruises
If that's the way
You insist on heading
Please be honest Mary Jane
Are you happy
Please don't censor your tears
You're the sweet crusader
And you're on your way
You're the last great innocent
And that's why I love you
So take this moment Mary Jane and be selfish
Worry not about the cars that go by
All that matters Mary Jane is your freedom
So Keep warm my dear, keep dry
Tell me
Tell me
What's the matter Mary Jane...
____________________________________________________________

It's Weird in My Head Again

Blazngfyre
Sheryl Crow - Steve McQueen
Well I went to bed in Memphis
And I woke up in Hollywood
I got a quarter in my pocket
And I'd call you if I could
But I don't know why
I gotta fly
I wanna rock and roll this part
I still wanna have some fun
I wanna leave you feeling breathless
Show you how the west was one
But I gotta fly
I gotta fly
Like Steve McQueen
All I need's a fast machine
I'm gonna make it all right
Like Steve McQueen
Underneath your radar screen
You'll never catch me tonite
I ain't takin' shit off no one
Baby that was yesterday
I'm an all American rebel
Making my big getaway
Yeah you know it's time
I gotta fly Like Steve McQueen
All I need's a fast machine
I'm gonna make it all right
Like Steve McQueen
Underneath your radar screen
We got rockstars in the Whitehouse
All our popstars look like porn
All my heroes hit the highway
They don't hang out here no more
You can call me on my cell phone
You can page me all night long
But you won't catch this freebird
I'll already be long gone
Like Steve McQueen
All we need's a fast machine
And we're gonna make it all right

Simply Satisfied
Sarah McLachlan - Possession
Listen as the wind blows
from across the great divide
voices trapped in yearning,
memories trapped in time
the night is my companion,
and solitude my guide
would I spend forever here
and not be satisfied?
And I would be the one to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away and after,
I'd wipe away the tears just close your eyes dear
Through this world I've stumbled
so many times betrayed
trying to find an honest word
to find the truth enslaved
oh you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhymes
my body aches to breathe your breath
your words keep me alive
And I would be the one to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away and after,
I'd wipe away the tears just close your eyes dear
Into this night I wander
it's morning that I dread
another day of knowing
of the path I fear to tread
oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
nothing stands between us here
and I won't be denied
and I would be the one to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away and after,
I'd wipe away the tears just close your eyes...

Magdala
Beth Orton - Central Reservation (Then Again Version)
Running down a central reservation in last nights red dress,
And I can still smell you on my fingers and taste you on my breath;
Stepping through brilliant shades,
All the color you bring,
This time, this time, this time,
Is fine just as it is.
Today is whatever I want it to mean,
Today is whatever I want it to mean.
Is this where memories are made,
Well, dreams do come true.
Everything I ever took for granted,
I want to see it through.
I step through every shade,
Any color you bring,
Cause this time, this time, this time,
Is fine just as it is.
Today is whatever I want it to mean,
Today is whatever I want it to mean.
It's like living in the middle of the ocean,
With no future, no past,
And everything that's good right now,
Well, I don't wish for it to last.
I'll step through brilliant shades,
Every color you bring,
Cause this time, this time, this time,
Is fine just as it is.
And today is whatever I want it to mean,
Today is whatever I want it to mean,
Today, today, is whatever I want it to mean,
Today is whatever I want it to mean.
____________________________________________________________
It's Weird in My Head

I recently realized that many of my favorite bloggers have theme music. At least in my head. There is a certain song I associate with just about all of you. So...over the next few days I'm going to list them. Some have obvious reasons, others I haven't quite figured out the connection. But any way...here goes.

Brisen
Lucinda Williams - Righteously
You don't have to prove
Your manhood to me constantly
I know you're the man
can't you see
I love you
Righteously
Why you wanna dis me
After the way you been kissin' me
After those pretty things you say
And the love we made today
When you run your hand
All up and run it back down my leg
Get excited and bite my neck
Get me all worked up like that
Think this through
I laid it down for you everytime
Respect me I give you what's mine
You're entirely way too fine
Arms around my waist
You get a taste of how good this can be
Be the man you ought to tenderly
Stand up for me
Flirt with me don't keep hurtin' me
Don't cause me pain
Be my lover don't play no game
Just play me John Coltrane

Buffalo
Creedence Clearwater Revival - Lodi
Just about a year ago, I set out on the road,
Seekin' my fame and fortune, lookin' for a pot of gold.
Things got bad, and things got worse,
I guess you will know the tune.
Oh ! Lord, Stuck in Lodi again.
Rode in on the Greyhound,
I'll be walkin' out if I go.
I was just passin' through, must be seven months or more.
Ran out of time and money, looks like they took my friends.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.
The man from the magazine said I was on my way.
Somewhere I lost connections, ran out of songs to play.
I came into town, a one night stand, looks like my plans fell through
Oh ! Lord, Stuck in Lodi again.
Mmmm...If I only had a dollar, for ev'ry song I've sung.
And ev'ry time I've had to play while people sat there drunk.
You know, I'd catch the next train back to where I live.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.
Oh ! Lord, I'm stuck in Lodi again.

Amethyst
Grant Lee Phillips - Far End of The Night
Buddy some Topeka night
When it’s just you and the road
Seen no tailights there for miles
And nothin’ much but static on the radio
Wasn’t lookin’ to the left
Wasn’t lookin’ to the right
Just kept walking’ like Virginia to the surf
Towards the far end of the night
Time hangs like a noose
Before me
Time stills to a crawl
Grinds so slowly
Heard my own beloved cry
I heard my one beloved moan
What’s the use in all the ache we must endure
I had no good reason why
Time hangs like a noose
Before me
Time stills to a crawl
Grinds so slowly
Not a rail to grasp ahold
Nor a savior there beside
Just kept a walkin’ like Virginia to the surf
Towards the far end of the night
Time hangs like a noose
Before me
Time stills to a crawl
Grinds so slowly
And time hangs like a noose
Around me
_____________________________________________________________

Me Too

Seems like there is a lot of these going around these days so I thought I'd try it.
Unfortunately "Twocents needs" gets me squat.
So I used my given name and then replaced it.

Twocents needs to collect secretary materials
Twocents needs a sanctuary, periodic retreat from the world and long luxurious baths. Twocents needs to be taken care of
Twocents needs to loosen up
Twocents needs to be near and serve
Twocents needs to explore her sexuality and have some intimacy in her life

Directions type "(your name) needs" (with the quotes) into google search. Pick out your favourite responses and post 'em.
_____________________________________________________________

An Intro

I'd like to introduce you to Ms. Jayne of Jayne Says. Please take the time to check her out. She's smart, she's funny and I like the way she thinks. She also posts faster than I can comment but I'm tryin' to catch up.
___________________________________________________________

Peace

I'm finding there is often a common topic amongst bloggers. A topic will be pressing on me only to find it's passing around the world o' blog. Religion, spirituality and acceptance have been a common theme lately.
I recently started taking a tax preparer class so I can make some extra money. The lady teaching the class knows I work at a church and was being very careful of the things she said in front of me. It was obvious, painfully, that she considered me a “church lady” and was monitoring her words. Last week I needed a ride to class and when she offered, I accepted. During the ride we both came to realize we have partied with many of the same people.
A few months ago I ran into a friend from high school that I’d lost touch with over the years. We did the how’s and when’s and where’s but when he found out where I work he didn’t want to be in the same place with me any longer. His reaction couldn’t have been more obvious then if I’d announced I had leprosy when he took a step back and snarled “Oh so you found God.” My answer, “No, I never lost him.”
The thing that amazes me is that the church people and the non-church people are equally leery of one another. My non-church friends try to forget what I do or act like my beliefs are a character flaw they must over look because they love me.
I have two best girlfriends. One is the pastor’s wife and the other is my lover. Neither of them gets to see all of who I am. I love them both dearly and I wish I could let those guards down. The reason I wrote Disclamer was that I hope this can be the place all of me is free. It means a lot that you were excepting.
-------------------------------
Oh by the way Amethyst... I wear my leather jacket to work every day in the winter, along with my jeans and boots. The ladies have learned to deal.
_____________________________________________________________

From Jason

1. What is your current occupation? Administrative Assistant to the Congregation. A lot of words to say I'm their bitch.
2. What color is your underwear? Black lace thongs
3. What are you listening to right now? Howie Day - Collide
4. What was the last thing you ate? Crackers, it's the day before payday and I'm broke.
5. Do you wish on stars? No
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Midnight blue, it was always the first one I wore out.
7. How is the weather right now? Cool, cloudy and threatening rain. We're in for the remains of Tammy.
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My Dad, to let me know he's picking up youngest son for dinner.
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yes, A whole lot!
10. How old are you today? 35
11.Favorite drink? Diet Mountain Dew, by the gallon, all day.
12. Favorite sport to watch? I would rather watch worms fucking than any sports event.
13. Have you ever dyed your hair? Well lets just say I can't remember what color it's supposed to be anymore.
14. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Wear? Neither. Need? Both
15. Pets? 3 cats, Spot, Fezzik and Fuzzbutt. My daughter has a piss machine poodle named Baby.
16. Favorite month? September
17. Favorite food? Any thing fried....hence the back up beeper on my ass.
18. What was the last movie you watched? Meet the Fockers - Assssss Hoooollleee.
19. Favorite day of the year? Ash Wednesday, during the service we write down our flaws that we would like to work on during the next year and the Pastor burns them and used the ashes for invocation. It's cleansing and introspective.
20. What do you do to vent anger? I don't which is why I'm developing an ulcer.
21. What was your favorite toy as a child? A Heinz ketchup bike. Really.. it was way cool!
22. Fall or Spring? Fall
23. Hugs or kisses? Hugs...a lot more personal.
24. Cherry or Blueberry? Blueberry.. they come into season in June, my birth month. When I was little my Mom made me a blueberry torte every year for my birthday.
25. When was the last time you cried? Tuesday, after yet another fight with Meenie. I only cry when I'm alone.
26. What is on the floor of your closet? All of my clothes
27. What is under your bed? All of my shoes
28. Who is the friend you have had the longest? Jody, My jewish princess.
29. What did you do last night? Dishes, dinner, laundry.
30. Favorite smell? Leather and sex. Preferably together
31. What inspires you? Joyful elderly people
32. What are you afraid of? Rats!!!!
33. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Cheese, and bacon. And onion and pickle and mayo and lettuce.
34. Favorite car? I don't have one
35. Favorite dog breed? Black lab. Unfortunately I'm allergic to dogs.
36. Number of keys on your key ring? 13
37. How many years at your current job? 4+
38. Favorite day of the week? Saturday, I duck pin bowl badly.
39. How many states have you lived in? Just one
40. What magazines do you subscribe to? None, most of them are trash anyway.
__________________________________________________________

Irish bookie withdraws 'Last Supper' ad
posted by twocents @ 12:00 AM   0 comments
About Me

Name: twocents
Home: Maryland, United States
About Me:
See my complete profile

Previous Post
Archives
Links