The sun is shining. Not outside, in here where I am. I think I've made it through to the other side once again. The bitch had me for awhile. The one that wants me to die. She waits for me to get tired or lonely or hurt, then she'll pounce. I think she's getting weaker. She didn't fight as hard this time and she won't be back anytime soon, I hope. I'll admit it finally, I have chronic depression. Yes, I could medicate it away but when I do I lose part of me too. I spent two years feeling nothing. Not sad or happy or angry or love. Nothing. Just can't do that again. So I'll keep fighting her. Drowning out her lies in my head with white noise. Lalalalala...hear that bitch? That's me. I'm getting stronger. Smarter too. |
I, too, have fought depression my whole life.
Congratulations on facing it head on... That is the toughest mountain to get over. I am proud of you!
And just like nightmares, when you face it, and tell it you are not afraid of it, it loses it's power.